The Phases of Decluttering

It's been a while, I realize, since I have last posted. Three months to be exact, but I've been on a truly life changing journey of many ups and downs.

Since the last time I blogged, I found myself in a dark place. I had been rejected by every internship I applied to, I was clueless of my purpose and I was ever more scared about my future.

I felt like a failure, so I decided to go on a voyage.

Danny Kaye once said, "To travel is to take a journey into yourself." I don't think anyone could have phrased it better. For a little over a month, I found myself in my definition of a utopia, a famous city you may know by the name of Rio de Janeiro.

It was absolute paradise. I learnt um pouco de portuguese, indulged in fantastic food, exercised regularly, read endlessly and even went outside my comfort zone and meet amazing people in the process.

After my almost amazing month in Rio, I came back to America more determined than ever. I knew I was going to be successful. I strengthened my walk with God, and fueled by His courage and power I applied to every internship I could get my hands on, and landed two great internships: One with Course Hero and another with a local startup called Broke Compass (which you should not only download but also follow on both Twitter, @BrokeCompassApp and Instagram @Broke_Compass). I was persistent and that lead to success.

Don't get me wrong, it wasn't a smooth ride and not everything is crystal clear and perfect at this moment. I still have my doubts, I fall down constantly and I continue to question. But I feel like I have a direction.

Which leads me to the decluttering.

Lately I have been feeling utterly stuffed, physically and mentally. It wasn't until this morning, when I was inspired by a Good Morning America segment, that I realized how my "hoarding," messiness and consumption habits had a direct correlation to my stuffy sentiments. According the the KonMari method, decluttering and getting rid of things that don't "spark joy" in your life with simultaneously improve your well-being.

So I've decided to take a stance and clean up my surroundings to improve my mind, body and soul.

Hence, I would like to introduce you to the Life Detox, a rough phase by phase plan created for myself that I would like to share with you all. This is a journey I feel I need to take in order to mature as a growing woman (I'm 21 after all). Looking back, I realize that most of my problems sparked the moment I was disorganized and surrounded by a lot of useless stuff, and it's only until know that I realize my mums nagging of "limpia, organiza y levanta tus cosas," finally hit me.

So here we go, are you ready to DETOX?!

Below find a little diagram I have created to highlight the steps of my Life Detox. Feel free to include more steps in the blank spaces surrounding the phase bubbles. What would you add to this diagram? Let me know! I would love to hear your thoughts.

The key to this process is to listen to yourself. Do what feels right for you. Go as quickly or as slowly as you need to. Get rid of the things that you know don't make you feel good and ignore other peoples thoughts. I've provided you with the skeleton, it's now your turn to create the rest.

When the answer is no

The worst thing about my current situation is that it was all my fault.

Rejection. The one word in the english language that carries emotional weight. The one word we all share the same fear of.

Yet, it plagues everything we do from the moment we are born.

Rejection goes hand in hand with judgment. Judgement of whether we are good enough for the job, the university, that boy, the program, the contest, the mortgage etc.

Judgement creeps into every day of our lives. Judgment is what holds us back, what can cause us to freeze, what can determine the future.

We are all judging.

Judgement also has two outcomes, acceptance or rejection.

Not much thought is giving to acceptance except pure joy. There is nothing wrong with joy. It is the best feeling anyone can feel.

Rejection is the disease. The one that comes with a truckload of negative emotions.

Defeat, sadness, frustration, guilt, shame. It even loops back to judgment of one's self.

I was judged and rejected, and it didn't matter what I had judged the situation to be.

So, I sat for the past few days in a roller coaster of emotions. Praying that the negative baggage would disappear, and I could move forward. There were moments when I did, and I had hopes for the future.

But it all just came crashing down at once. One moment, everything was great. I had acceptance, the judgment forces were in my favor. But in a matter of three days, that radiant energy was destroyed.

Then came the moments when I just needed to cry. Is there something wrong with that?

I can't let the "no," the rejection and the feelings take over. It's cliche, but when on door closes, others do open, even if multiple doors have been closed and you are left with nothing.

Furthermore, energy cannot be created or destroyed. That's the first thing we all learn in physics. So there is still that radiant energy somewhere inside me. I just have to move on from the negative, and ask God for strength and assurance.

When the answer is no, all we can do is move forward. It's okay to cry a little, but it is a sign that something better is coming.

When there is judgment, there is hope.

I think I'm in Love

It was love at first sight. The stupid kind of love. The kind of love that is based solely on physical attraction.

Yet, I also felt this electric connection between us. It wiggled through the air and into my heart. It might have been invisible, and it might have been only one way, but I feel those stomach fluters swarming in.

I can't stop thinking about him. I feel cursed because though the thoughts bring smiles, it's frustrating and helpless.

I may never see him again. I may be too shy to talk to him, but like many love songs, there was something about him.

Is conflict worth it?

"What is the point of having a conflict if we are all going to die anyways?" - Mohamed Nasheed

In the midst of our world destruction, we can find unexpected leaders that seem to view the world correctly.